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Dear F,
On some days and even more nights I catch myself considering reaching out again. I keep asking myself if it’s worth keeping my distance if my thoughts keep coming back to you anyway. Even if I don’t think about you consciously, my subconsciousness brings you back in my dreams regularly.
Walking down the street nobody quite fits the comparison I automatically draw. No eyes are ever deep enough, no voice ever calming like yours and no appearance ever as charming as you were.
I knew it would need time to stop hoping to see you around every corner I turn, but instead of a slowly fading memory the pull to walk our old paths grows stronger.
Maybe one day I will stop seeing your ghost everywhere I go and with every step I take, but I’m not yet there. I have still a long way to go.
Love,
Z
Dear F,
You might have moved away, but it doesn’t make me miss you less. The growing distance between us doesn’t mean I don’t miss the effortless conversations we had at all times of the day. It doesn’t make me forget how at peace you seemed when you could forget the world around you when it was just us. But most importantly it doesn’t make the beat of my heart calm down when I think about you.
You might have moved away, but I will always carry you with me.
Love, Z
Dear F,
I finally found someone who makes me feel almost as safe as you did, but I can’t stop comparing them to you. I know very well that you two are from different stars and that no one will make me feel just as you did, but the similarity in the intensity makes me loose my breath.
While I feel so very at home with them, I start missing you even more. I see your smile wherever I look and hear your voice in every word I hear. I have never felt so at peace and so at home at the same time. There is no way to describe this confusion with words.
They are not you, you are not them and I am neither complete without the memory of you, nor without their presence.
Yours,
Z
